Up Yours Middle English

I'm needing a good 15-minute break from translating Middle English so I thought I could do an updated blog post. Oh yes, you read that right. Translating Middle English. I'll write it again for added affect. TRANSLATING MIDDLE ENGLISH. And this isn't Shakespeare English. This is Chaucer English. Just pure shite (I believe that's the translation). Anyways, here I am. Well, last week's coaching class got even better after Coach McLeod came in for a visit. We were waiting for our lecture to begin on Thursday and coach Tom Crean was introduced to the class. Immediately he was the greatest person to ever step into one of my classrooms. He talked about leadership in coaching and other stuff (See Bo for full transcript of class).

The class definitely ranks as the most memorable class I've taken in my six-plus years of college, barely edging out the Err Dizz's "Boy would be good at poker because his face is paralyzed" incident in Anthro class (See Err to explain) and the Demo tongue-lashing of Scheid the Glide and I for being dumbasses in the back of a "serious" journalism class. Good times all around. I'm hoping Crean comes back tomorrow so I'm better prepared with autograph supplies. I've worn my Crean and Crimson shirt 52.7 times to class this semester and the one day he shows up, I'm wearing a polo. Smooth.

His appearance came at a good time, because just during lecture I downgraded my IU prediction win-total down to 4. Yep, only four games. Everyday we hear the coaching staff talk about how bad these players suck, but after hearing Crean speak I was ready to parachute over to Afganiland and drive a tank into Durka-Durakministan. He's very, very, very motivational and inspritational. So that bumps my prediction up to 8 games. I figure his speeches will be worth a few wins.

2 minutes...2-ah
Jesus Christ. The prodigal son returns to Indy to make a roster spot at training camp. Someone shoot me if we offer him another 7-year deal. But Bird thinks a winning team will fill the seats of Conseco again. Pretty profound statement.

It's Beetles...with an A
With Paul surviving Israel, all is quiet in Beatle news. This idiot does a review of the song "Chains" from the Beatles' first album, but gets the lead singer wrong. It's George damnit. In the words of Phil Friend, "C'mon!!!"

I Me Mine
This segment is dedicated to other Sean Stevenson's in the world who somehow land in my news alerts. This dude recovered a fumble during a big 27-7 win for the Vikings. What's with everyone with my name playing football? Where did I go wrong? Way to bring celebrity and greatness to our name!

Mrs. Thug Mrs.
Some video of Lauren thrashing Doug over his little date with She-Pratt.

Hello, Mr. Radio
In honor of Scarlett's marriage to Ryan Reynolds. Enjoy!

You've got a Friend in Phil
New Section! Haven't put much thought into this yet so we're going it at kind of rough here, just how Phil likes it. I've never read this until recently (as in 5 minutes ago when I searched for things to put here) but Dwight K. Schrute's blog is hilarious.

Info for Bo
You get the YouTube of this post (see below).

You tube...no, you're a tube
WOO HOO! New Scrubs coming to ABC. When? I don't have a clue, but here's an ABC preview that is seriously lacking in new clips. Only new clip I saw was at the 1:23 mark when JD has a beard. But, still, it's Scrubs so you gotta watch.

Hey you! Get off my McLeod

That's right. I combined a classic Rolling Stones song with my new favorite basketball player who ever hailed from St. John's, Duke and the Atlanta Hawks -- the one and only Roshown McLeod. "But Sean, don't you have his 1998-99 Fleer Brilliants rookie card stored away in a box somewhere?" Indeed I do young one. And I found it! There it is to the right of your screen. So why do I have this new found devotion to the greatest basketball player known as McLeod? Well the dude came and spoke to our Coaching of Basketball class on Tuesday. He was just hired this summer as an assistant coach for Tom Crean at IU, so they brought him to help us digest what defense is...well, that didn't really work.

"I never played much defense," McLeod said in his opening remarks, and we never got back on topic for the next 50 minutes as he proceeded to tell his life story. First of all, the guy has an ego the size of Lucas Oil Stadium. Had he not injured his knee and then ruptured his achille's tendon (sounds fairly painful) he claims he would be All-Star in the league right now. Well, that's doubtful. In class, he told us that all of his stats improved each year he was in the league (only 3 years by the way) and that he averaged 17 ppg in his last year so he was destined for glory. A quick look at his basketball-reference stat sheet shows some different numbers. Part of that is true, most of his numbers did improve but he only averaged 9.6 ppg in his last season in 2001. Whatever. I fogive any man who plays his highlight tape to his audience before entering the room to speak (note to self: create highlight tape to the song "Soul Man" and get any job I want).

Well he had quite a few good stories (Dikembe Mutombo and Steve Smith taking him shopping to buy suits; coaching high school basketball for $70,000 per year w/o teaching) but the best two stories had to do with some famous coaches. His high school was Bobby Hurley and one time McLeod hurt himself during a game and was sitting down with an ice pack on his hip. Hurley was pissed at how the team was playing, looked over at McLeod, took his ice pack and shattered it against wall, afterwhich he said, "You're not hurt until I say you're hurt." I will never forget that line.

The other story had to deal with Duke coach Mike Krzyzewski. It was during McLeod's senior season and Duke lost Elton Brand to a season-ending injury. Instead of being like most coaches who try to play the injury off so you're team doesn't worry about it, Krzyzewski entered the locker room by saying "What are we going to do now? We just lost our best player?" McLeod stood up and said, "Coach! I'm your best player. Just give me the opportunity to show you what I can do." Krzyzewski didn't say a word and just walked out. My respect for the Duke coach just went up 43 percent. Love it.

Anyways, it was an interesting class...on to the links

2 minutes...2-ah
Finally! Somebody did a decent in-dept look at the Pacers schedule this season. Was that so hard IndyStar? I didn't think so. In the words of Roshown McLeod, "You are pussies."

It's Beetles...with an A
Paul McCartney has just arrived for his big concert in Israel. Should be interesting to see if this whole terrorist threat actually plays out. I'm gonna be honest, I'm not sure how I would deal with Ringo being the lone surviving Beatle at this point. That can't be good for anybody.

Info for Bo
You need to buy this card immediately in honor of your favorite St. John's/Duke/Atlanta player.

I Me Mine
This segment is dedicated to other Sean Stevenson's in the world who somehow land in my news alerts. This Sean had an assist for the American Internation College team's lone goal in a 2-1 loss to the New York Institute of Technology. C'mon team! Sean can't do everything himself! Way to bring celebrity and greatness to our name!

Hello, Mr. Radio
I feel like I can't go wrong with The Hills in this section so here ya go...enjoy!

I can't believe there isn't a YouTube video of McLeod to put on here. Unbelievable! I'm boycotting YouTube for the entirety of this blog post until one is put up online. Also, check Joel's blogs for some cool pics of Mellencamp in Columbus this week. Peace out homies.

Ball State, Ball State, Ball State

Yeah it's a good morning to be a Ball State alum or student. What a great game last night. I had to listen to the first half on the radio on the way home, but getting to watch Ball State beat my current school, IU, in HDTV was a special moment. I gotta tell ya, going in to the start of the week, I was just hoping for a good game and if Ball State won that would be awesome. Then after spending two days on the IU campus, I wanted the Cards to smash the living shizgeezus out of em. I kept telling everyone in my classes that Ball State had a great chance of winning and that they shouldn't be surprised, but IU fans deemed a loss impossible. Bo was the only other IU student who gave Ball State a chance. Dad summed the rivalry up pretty good...Centerville vs. Richmond. Luckily, I never had to attend Richmond, which will be referred to as Satan's School for the duration of this blog, but the rivalry produced the same feeling I had all week at IU.

Anyways, kudos to BSU and, of course, best wishes to Dante Love for a speedy rocovery. Old fellow co-worker Greg Fallon says 12-0 anyone? I'd have to say "Yes!"

One more quick note on the game. I thought it was great watching the camera pan to show Brady Hoke and Bill Lynch on the sidelines and just compare their demeanor. Maybe it was because he was losing to his former team or he realized everything Hep built up at IU was crumbling before his very eyes, but Lynch (notice dead man walking to your right) looked standoffish, never talked to anyobody, had both headphones on at all times and basically looked shut off from his team. Hoke, on the other hand, was always talking to someone, whether another coach or player, while pacing the sideline yelling out orders and looking like a man willing his team to victory. If any AD's were watching that game, I'm sure Hoke will be getting lots of phone calls this offseason. Anyways, if you want real analysis of the game, visit Phil's blog (link to your right).

On to the links...

In a Champagne Supernova in the sky
For fear of being persecuted, shot and castrated by the record industry, I will NOT post the leaked new Oasis album on my blog. But I do own it already and it's really, really, really good. Seriously. I definitely recommend acquiring somehow, someway when it's officially released on Oct. 6.

It's Beetles...with an A
A new John Lennon movie is being made to showcase his youth and his relationship with his mother until her death when he was 17. This article says the movie will rely on some information from his diaries, so the movie will probably be pretty twisted. For non-fanatic Beatle fans who don't know the details, the movie should be eye-opening.

2 minutes...2-ah
Tinsley is still being shopped around apparently and no one is biting. I'd like to see some quotes from Jamaal here soon. I'd love to hear what he thinks about all this. I'll contact him if I need to, it's not too far to the 8 Second Saloon from my apartment.

I Me Mine
New segment! I know you're very excited, but not as much as me. This segment is dedicated to other Sean Stevenson's in the world who somehow land in my news alerts. This dude ran for 77 yards and TD. Sounds just like something I would do. Way to bring celebrity and greatness to our name!

Info for Bo
This sounded like something you were a part of in B-town this weekend.

Hello, Mr. Radio
I believe, and I'm not 100 percent sure, this was the sideline reporter for last night's IU-BSU game. I've never watched a Big 10 football game on the network before and they didn't show her name in the 2nd half. Oh well...enjoy.

Mrs. Thug Mrs.
Since you're watching the final season of Gilmore Girls and you don't like what's happening, I dug up this little nugget to explain why the final season is the series' worst. "The entirety of the 7th season was not written or produced by Amy Sherman-Palladino. As such, it is seen by many fans and critics as the weakest season of the show."

Look Ma, new post!

After another week-long sabbatical, we're back with a vengeance! Well, I'm out of things to say already so...on to the links.

In a Champagne Supernova in the sky
Oasis is currently touring and frontman Noel Gallagher is currently blogging. But things hit a snag last week in London, Canada, when some old, dumbass ran onstage and shoved Gallagher on the ground and into the monitor speakers. Gallagher is bruised up, shows are being canceled. Typical Oasis. But the new single sounds good, but as usual, the B-side sounds better.

It's Beetles...with an A
Paul is taking his life into his own hands (or someone else's hands) when he does his concert in Israel on Sept. 25. Terrorists groups are saying they will attack unless he cancels the concert. But according to this journalist (who apparently has phone numbers to several top terrorist leaders...and our gov't doesn't have these why exactly?) says many terrorist leaders don't have a clue who Paul is or they haven't heard Beatle songs. No wonder they want to blow up the world! One listen to All You Need Is Love and they would have driven those planes into fields of pillows full of love, drugs and flowers.

Mrs. Thug Mrs.
Happy Birthday! To celebrate the great day of the 15th of September, here is the day in history along with famous people born on the day. I know, this is weak, but I swear the cake will taste good.

Hello, Mr. Radio
In honor of the Eagles-Cowboys game tonight, I present Jessica Romo...enjoy!

Info for Bo
Good piece on Ed Helms and his love for Andy Bernard.

You tube...no, you're a tube
I was gonna put the Tina Fey as Sarah Palin skit on SNL from this weekend, but NBC always gets that stuff off youtube, so find it yourself and enjoy.

Nostradamus Is In The House

So I predicted it would happen in Week 2 and "it" would be a season-ending groin injury, but I should still get some points for predicting the season-ending injury that occurred to Tom Brady yesterday during Week 1 action. Now I just need Moss to force a trade, Gisele to dump his ass and I'll be sitting pretty. Unfortunately, my prediction madness continued as the Colts proved me right that Bears look at least decent this year. The Colts also don't look like the Colts of old (something else I predicted...ok, here's your lotto numbers for tomorrow...8-17-68-3-23...book it). Indy looked listless and played with a complete lack of urgency, and although Manning could be blamed partly for the first half (as Tom said, Peyton looked like he had took a few tokes with Mary Jane before the game, apparently he couldn't kick that medicinal marijuana he received after surgery), I thought he picked it up in the second half while his teammates just thought he could do all the work. Also, when do we bury Harrison? I'm pretty sure he's dying carcass needs disposed of somewhere. Well, stay tuned for the rest of the NFL season to see more of my predictions come true and best of luck with the lottery tomorrow.

Anyways, we're here today only to have two subcategories in order to make up for not having them in either of the past two blogs. After receiving hundreds of angry e-mails and calls, Bo and my wife should be happy with being featured this week. Look for all the subcategories to return in the next blog edition. On to the links....

Mrs. Thug Mrs.
After seeing your addiction to Gilmore Girls reach new highs this weekend, I thought I should help you find a site where you can share your addiction with other fans of the show, which is here. Also, here's an book you might be interested in that will keep you going after you speed through the final two seasons this week. Big hole!

Info for Bo
Here's the link to the updated roster list for the IU men's basketball team. Surprise! We forgot they actually do have someone else besides Tabor who is bigger than 6'5" and this dude is actually 6'8", so that's awesome. That actually changes my "wins prediction" from 5-8 wins this season to 6-9 wins this year.

Final NFL picks...Book It (Pizza Hut style)

In what's being called "The Greatest NFL Preview south of Crown Point," part II arrives to finish off the regular season standings and playoff teams. Who will win the Super Bowl. Well hell if I know, but I'm gonna give it my best, biased shot. But before we get into the action, let's get political.

I just finished reading the latest TIME magazine that features John McCain on the cover. I've always like McCain. He seems like a good guy, good citizen and generally a good politician. He seemed honest with the media and people and he often criticized our current president. I encourage everyone to read this week's magazine as you'll quickly realize that McCain has turned himself into Captain Douchebag (he will be referred to as this for the entirety of this blog's existence) in order to win this election. Not only has he shifted his ideals to the far right and to conform with the current president in order to win over big time republicans, but he's completely stopped himself from being cordial and honest with the media. Please read this interview from the magazine. The interviewer actually asks Capt. D "Do I know you?" Anyways, the interview and the other articles helped turn me completely off Capt. D and his seafood restaurants. Oh, and if you were like me and lots of other people who immediately thought of teachers or librarians from porn movies when you saw Capt. D's VP pick, Sarah Palin, then here's an article for you.

AFC WEST
1. Chargers: Pretty obvious choice even for me.
2. Broncos: Staying with politics, the DNC will propel this team to glory, but they'll miss that coveted wild card slot by one game. Book it.
3. Raiders: McFadden pulls a Peterson and helps the Raiders get five wins.
4. Chiefs: They look like they suck...period.

AFC SOUTH
1. Jaguars: I know, I know. The Colts will not win this division this year. No way, no how. I root for the Blue, but they're just not healthy enough for an entire season. But, like 2006, they'll get everyone healthy enough by the time playoff season begins.
2. Colts: Well shit, I said everything about the Colts in the Jags part. My bad.
3. Titans: Honestly, how long can one coach stay with a team?
4. Texans: They look like they suck...exclamation point.

NFC SOUTH
1. Saints: Brees carrys the load for my fantasy team as we sail to glory.
2. Panthers: Steve Smith comes back and lights a fire under his team with more assualts.
3. Bucs: Really coulda used Favre.
4. Falcons: They look like they suck...really, really suck.

NFC WEST
1. Seahawks: Winner of a crappy division.
2. Cardinals: Really? Cardinals in 2nd? Wow.
3. 49ers: No QB yet they still don't get last? Really?
4. Rams: They suck...period.

WILD-CARD ROUND
Colts over Titans...Jets over Broncos....Cowboys over Seahawks...Giants over Bears

DIVISIONAL ROUND
Colts over Steelers....Jags over Jets....Cowboys over Saints...Eagles over Giants

CONFERENCE CHAMPIONSHIP
Colts over Jags...Cowboys over Eagles

SUPER BOWL
Colts over Cowboys: Oh yeah! So the Jags win the division, but they don't have the experience to win the AFC. As for the Cowboys, they've got the pieces to get to the SB, but Indy needs another Super Bowl, so they get one. That's how it works. Book it.

2 minutes...2-ah
Not much Pacer news, but breaking news tonight about two rookies who hail from Kansas were kicked out of the rookie training camp in New York for having pot in their hotel room. Luckily, one of them was not Pacer rookie Brandon Rush, who was a Jayhawk last season.

Hello, Mr. Radio
Gotta give ya the photo of "then and now" of Mrs. Palin. Enjoy.

In a Champagne Supernova in the sky...
New category for Oasis news. With the new album coming out soon, the band just started a world tour. But the best news is that Noel Gallagher is doing a daily blog on the tour. The foul-mouthed leader of the band holds nothing back and is absolutely hilarious. If you like the rock music world, I recommend the blog here. You will need to register with the site to read the blog, but it's free so stop being a lazy bastard and do it. Excerpt from the blog:

"Pulled into some truck stop for breakfast. I love truck stops, you never know if you’re gonna meet a preacher or a serial killer. Ask the waitress for 7 menus. She looked at us like it was the 1st time she’d been asked for 7 of anything in her life! The restaurant / bar area has a little dance floor and a stage at one end and a speak your weight machine at the other! What the fuck? Shit food and all. It’s a small price to pay though. The rest of the boys have flown rather than brave the bus. I’ve never understood that. This is the whole point of touring. Staring out the window, watching the world go by."

Good stuff.