No, I hate the Wii...remote controller. It has nothing to do with controls or the wireless function. It has nothing to do with how it's configured to my hand motion. It has nothing to do with gameplay. It has to do with a little something that the Mrs. Thug Mrs. calls "temper-tantrums."Now I have a long, storied history with video game controllers. Starting with the original NES system, to the Super Nintendo blue and gray controller, to the "M" shaped N64 controller, and all the way to my favorite controller of all-time -- the PS2. All these controllers shared one common bond. I loved to smash them.
There was no better feeling in the world after your QB, who had a 99 passer rating, threw an interception to the worst-ranked defense in Madden 04 and you could raise your right hand high in the air and propel the PS2 remote into the ground like a V-2 rocket slamming London in WWII. It was the perfect way to handle anger management. One flick of the wrist and all your troubles went away as you destroyed the controller on the 2nd floor of 920 Neely. I went through countless PS2 remotes throughout college. I believe the PS2 remote suffered the most damage of all consoles throughout my lifetime of wrath with the N64 a close second. But the see-through PS2 controllers added another dimension as you could literally see the parts that you destroyed so recklessly after your mobster got shot into oblivion and back in the Godfather.
But something in my life is now missing. My anger issues have been transferred to other areas of my life because of one thing: I no longer have a PS2. I have a Wii. Sure, I tried throwing my Wii controller. Not wanting to break my HDTV, I use the dork strap to keep the remote tied to my hand. After losing the longest game ever played in Wii Tennis, I raised my hand toward the sky and slammed the remote toward the ground. It unfortunately was still tied to my hand. The result was a Wii remote to the groin. I missed 6-8 weeks on the injured list.
Now when I'm missing 10 foot putts on Tiger Woods 10 and after I'm done cursing out announcer Scott Van Pelt for his insufferable commentary on my bad putting, I rear up to throw the remote. But I can't do it. My anger gets bottled up inside until the next day when I can yell at first graders all day. But I'm worried. I need to throw a remote. It was part of the aura of playing video games. Now it's lost. I've thought about buying a used PS2 remote just for throwing purposes. The wife, obviously, thinks I belong in a mental institution. Ringo feels the same way. Either way, I need to throw something. So...Ringo, let's see how far you fly.
On to the links...
2 minutes...2-ah
Personal plug: Go visit IndyCornrows for any news on your Indiana Pacers from yours truly. You can also join my cult-like following on Twitter. Also, next week I will have full control of the site so expect some big things as I follow the blue and gold.
Hello, Mr. RadioAnd...enjoy.
Mrs. Thug Mrs.
More Jon and Kate news about Jon's "bimbo" girlfriend. Ahh, makes me proud of IU.
Info for Bo
The WWE is teasing the fact that Shaq will wrestle during next week's Monday Night RAW. I'm thinking Shaq vs. Hornswoggle. Of course, if McMahon can get a Kobe vs. Shaq main event, I will piss myself.
I, Me, Mine
This segment is dedicated to the other Sean Stevenson's in the world who somehow land in my news alerts/google search. So, either this person is a female Sean Stevenson, or he's a little fruity, but Inquirer.net, the Philippines news site dedicated to Filipinos, ran a story about using the right foundation for your skin tone. The entire article is a dissertation by Sean Stevenson telling people how to match your skin tone to your foundation. Totally awesome. Anyways, my boy/girl Sean dominates the article with tons of sweet quotes. I feel like there is a whole world of make-up out there for the Sean Stevenson's of the Earth. I've really missed the boat. So Sean, thank you for bringing celebrity and greatness to our name.
It's Beetles...with an APaul McCartney played on the Letterman Show last week and it was a great appearance. If I wasn't ready to eat, I would find the links but alas that will not happen. The more important Beatle news today was the announcement of 15 more songs for the Beatles: Rock Band video game. One of those songs will interest the readers of this blog. Yes, one of the first songs that you'll encounter in the game is Twist and Shout. It will set during the Beatles stay at the Cavern Club in Liverpool. I would argue that a cheat code should be made where the Beatles play it at the Chug in Muncie.
You Tube...no, you're a tube
P Money in all his glory at the ESPY's this weekend. Best. QB. Ever.
Posts
