Your Mandated Indiana Pacer Update

So I know you're wondering how the 08-09 Indiana Pacers are stacking up against the 93-94 Indiana Pacer team. Thank God I'm here to help you out. You'd really be nowhere in life without me. Think about it.

Well the Pacers have kinda been a-struggling a-lately. Oh, it's not that they mean too. In fact, they are very pure at heart. But the bottom line is that they suck pineapples through straws, which is some intense sucking. A wonderful performance last night, a 135-115 loss to the Denver Nuggets, resulted in three things happening: 1) the Pacers fell to 12-22 on the season, which is good for last place in the Central Division and tied for second-to-last in the Eastern Conference with a powerhouse team you and I know as the Charlotte Bobcats; 2) they have finally resorted to trying to injury the other team's star player every game and this time the Pacers finally got it right by breaking Melo' (Carmelo) Anthony's hand; and 3) their extreme suckdom allowed me to put all of my viewing power into last night's Raw, which was a particularly good episode ending with a tagteam match between Orton-Jericho and Cena-Michaels and we learned that Cena will face Michaels next week, while Mr. McMahon will return in two weeks!!!! That's quality entertainment.

Now back to the fake stuff. So are the 08-09 Pacers on pace to still reach the Eastern Conference Finals? You won't believe this, but they are still only five games out of the 8th spot in the East. No, seriously, believe it. Here's evidence. But the people are really wanting know if the team is still on pace with that 93-94 team of the century. I'm gonna be honest with you. They kinda are. The 08-09 team is 12-22, the 93-94 team was 12-17 on Jan. 8, 1994. That's close enough. That Pacer team finished January with a 17-23 record before losing only two games in Feburary.

This is entirely possible for this year's Pacers as the prodigal son, Mike Dunleavy, returns this week from unkown and undiagnosed injuries. All the Pacers need to do is become complete badasses and put on a show similar to Batista's romp-kicking of Michaels during that bloody stretcher match this summer. I'll even add that if Danny Granger "Batista Bombs" Kobe Bryant on Friday (see picture to the right for demonstration of so-called "Batista Bomb"), that I will consider this season a WIN no matter what our record is. A year-long suspension would be totally worth it.

I'll get ya another update here in a couple weeks after Dunleavy has used his exhaustive and choking defensive abilities to help lead the team back into the winner's column once and for all.

On to the links...

It's Beetles...with an A
Leave it up to the Norwegians to finally get things right. You can now download the Beatles song catalog for free through a Norwegian Web site, who has the rights after airing the songs in 2001 with special commentary from journalists about the backgrounds of each song. Don't worry though, only the commentary is in Norwegian.

Info for Bo
Scrubs is on tonight!!!! So get yer shite together and sit down for an hour and watch it. Stop reading and go watch! Seriously!

My Sox are White
Scrubs is on tonight!!!! So get yer shite together and sit down for an hour and watch it. Stop reading and go watch! Seriously people!!!!!!!!

Hello Mr. Radio
Here are three good reasons why to watch professional wrestling...enjoy.

Mrs. Thug Mrs.
No, I refuse to put a picture of a naked John Cena on my blog, so you'll just have to imagine that one...ok...you can stop now....no, you're done...seriously, go watch Scrubs with me!!!

I Me Mine
Since apparently the Sean Stevenson's of the world have taken the Holiday Break to the extreme and done absolutely nothing noteworthy, I've taken to internet googling to find some interesting things. Remember, this segment is dedicated to the other Sean Stevenson's in the world who somehow land in my news alerts/google search. This guy is living up to our nerd side of things. He apparently wrote the roleplaying article "Let the Dice Decide" for White Wolf Magazine 15. The article is so famous that it garnered Sean an entry on the extremely prestigious site Wookieepedia and it is his lone entry. After some journalistic research by yours truly (thank God I spent 4 1/2 years getting that journalism degree), I found out that this article was printed in April 1989, and it's topic is "Random Character Generation" in Star Wars.

I, unfortunately, failed miserably at trying to find that actual article (I sense Lori Demo throwing up bits of children's souls on my transcript as I write this...hmmm). But I'm sure whatever it said, it was a great way to bring celebrity and greatness to our name!